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Measures against Embarrassment

As the photo in my last post reveals, the test dalek cake could not be deemed successful by any conventional standards. I may well make/ buy a victoria sponge and cover it with candles, and the dalek mould will be used for a vast vodka jelly. Of course, I have never made a vodka jelly in my life before, so there's always a possibility that it will be worse than the dalek banana bread, but I find that hard to believe - yesterday's attempt must surely be some kind of nadir in baking history.

Speaking of history and dubious tests, what with the US looking increasingly embarrassed about Russia and the UK looking increasingly embarrassed about the US, I think we look nicely set up for mortification all round. Trump's visit to the UK looks fabulous: London is set to be unreasonable, Brum seems ready to give the man a perfect storm of a welcome, and Scotland appears to be lining up along the border preparing to lift its collective kilt at the first sight of him. May has made a mistake with this. Even if Trump was not controversial, even if he turns out actually to be all right, jumping the gun and offering him this sort of very rare distinguishment looks like desperate flattery because that is exactly what it is. Nobody wants to play Uriah Heep. It has coloured reactions to the visit considerably.

Her best hope would be to offer him the hospitality of Rockall, which is not only bracing and hard for protesters to access, but home to more interesting invertebrates than Westminster.

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