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On the town

Saw Izzard at the Palace theatre, thanks to a friend's gift. It's his last tour (Izzard's not the friends's) before going into politics, and it was as surreal as ever. Prior to the show we wandered Chinatown, enjoying the vibe on the streets as people revved up to celebrate the Year of the Monkey. Enjoying jasmine tea, catching up on the future and the past... all good. There's a lot to consider.

Been so tired since Oz,beginning to wake up and think again.

Pfah. I am still tired, reading the above. Time to pull myself together.

This jetlag has been very frustrating.

But once again, the issue of moving to Oz permanently has turned up. There are issues that might make it a no-goer, but it is a far more credible idea now than it was 3 years ago, when we first went out there. Then I was suffering from severe PTSD and other related issues. Most people were very kind, some were not. That's the way life is, I guess, and if you had to count up the pros and cons, I did OK. I was ready to run; run forever from GB (though I don't count Scotland in that group of countries. In my 'escape route' dreams Scotland still remains viable because I love it) run to some other place less alloyed with cruelty and unhappiness from my early days til now. Not that my unhappy experiences have much to do with the reality of Blighty I guess, or if they do,they shouldn't be allowed to tip the scales... in any case, I was up for leaving because I have always been up for leaving, because desperation had finally hit me so hard I couldn't hack it anymore, and because I need sunlight,and Oz has it. It doesn't have everything I would want from my forever home (big mammals and waterfalls) but light, light on my skin, and heat, and the sea! And the birds squawking, and Sydney, then up to the tropics of Queensland!

And a sense of starting again. Discussed this with my friend as we enjoyed the streets full of lanterns and wishes in red paper. Starting again, a good thing. But I'm so glad Larians and I didn't go then, because it would have been running away instead of running to...and in the end, we were just too exhausted to move. Now I don't need to escape, so ironically, it would all be much easier to do. If we go, it's not fueled by despair, it's just a new day. While in Oz I dreamed that someone gave me the keys to the Tower of London. It felt so important... as though I could access history and more, but also that what was once a prison was now something else.

Anyway once again, it's the magical 18 month period ahead of us, see where we are by then... We will see what happens. Whether here, there, or somewhere else entirely, life is becoming interesting.



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